Friday, 21 November 2008

The future is in the cards

“You’re currently having some financial issues.” Ummm no s*** Sherlock – we’re in the middle of a recession.

The bespectacled, hunched and knurled man sits, his long black coat pooling around his feet, and reads my future. It’s all in the cards you see.

I’d gone to see him on a whim – well, word of mouth. Of course I was interested to know whether I would win Lotto, be swept off my feet by a tall, dark and handsome (and rich) man – preferably Brad Pitt, be the next Prime Minister of New Zealand or solve the world’s ills. Well, clearly there was something wrong with those cards. Brad Pitt did not feature once.

One has to be sceptical about this sort of thing (and certainly when the grey-haired gentleman started talking in Latin – or whatever language it was – I thought I was being sold a scam). I mean it comes down to common sense doesn’t it? The likelihood I’m going to meet a man and fall in love when I’m single is relatively high. The likelihood I’m going to be having financial issues in the middle of a recession is a no-brainer. And a New Zealand accent among British ones is going to guarantee a trip to my homeland at some time.

But this guy was freaky. He picked out the exact month I was going to be returning home for a holiday. Had I said something that had given him a hint? Or was it down to probability? Or was it just common sense again? – When is the most likely time an antipodean will visit home? Summer, right?

But this whole thing got me thinking. Regardless of whether you believe or not, it poses some interesting questions about fate and destiny. Does it really exist? Do I still have power to change my destiny laid out in the cards or is it set in stone? Can I be fed ideas to make what I’ve been told come true?

It is this last point that is really intriguing. If I’m told I am going to enter into a relationship with a childhood friend – who at that point is just that; a friend – does this put the seed in my head that, well actually, he’s not half bad and does the way he playfully pinches my arm like he has always done mean he wants more? Or I am told I am going to win Lotto. You’ve got to be in to win, so of course I will start buying Lotto tickets.

The other thing is, why do fortune tellers never seem to tell you anything really bad? Not good for business? Or telling us only what we want to hear?

Well, I have to say I was pleased with my reading. I should get a promotion in the coming year and a pay rise. I came out of it feeling positive about my future.


But apparently, I will not be winning Lotto, regardless of how many tickets I buy.

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